Twitterings

I now feel the weight of my beaten soul, advancing years and cantankerous being when I merely imagine my activities… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
I would pretend I could go back and warn the captain of the Titanic about icebergs, encourage Elvis to eat fewer bu… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
When I was a young boy, I used to daydream about the things I would do if I was a superhero who could time-travel. 1/3
Benedict Francis #Resist #FBR #FBPE #ABTV #WATON
Any of this a-ringin' a bell?
@DixiDoodle Both from the same cloth. Lovingly conceived after extracting the spooge from one of Mr Murdoch's used… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
@DominicRaab @mrjamesob Aw, poor wittle waab can't handle the pain of watching himself be a twat. Bless his little Nazi socks.
@Mooglymoo I get that a lot, after my regular MP/sex-toy comparisons. Thank you! 🤣
Is it me, or does this chap always look like he's discretely trying to chow-down on the backside of a mutated, kill… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Dear @theresa_may, Apparently, leave means leave. So, fuck off! P.S. I suggest you lock the door on your way ou… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
You've been given your orders, @BrineMP. Now do your job and represent your constituents for a change, instead of a… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Imagine needing a pee for six hours, but caring not a jot, because you knew you'd weirdly look back on that feelng… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Imagine spending six hours laughing hysterically because you can't stop thinking about Farage and his 'majority' of… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Imagine hearing and feeling the heartbeat of an entire nation without the filter of a loud minority of corruption and hate.
Imagine the feeling that somehow, waiting in that line of beautiful individuals from far and wide felt like you wer… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Imagine not giving a crap you've been standing with them for six hours, smiling non-sensically because somehow you… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Imagine standing in a queue at your local supermarket for six hours with a million people you've never met, but som… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Dear @theresa_may, I read an alarming article in the bath this morning, in which you suggested you were on my side… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Is there really anyone with a modicum of intelligence that would crown this embarrassingly productive wet fart?
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: It's curious how much Michael Gove looks and sounds like an overused d… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
RT @benfrancis: Getting to London on a Saturday: £20. Having over a million people travel across the country and continent to visit your w…
Getting to London on a Saturday: £20. Having over a million people travel across the country and continent to visi… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
I knew watching Blue Peter would one day pay off. All that fucking sticky-backed plastic I was saving from the 80s,… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Benedict Francis #Resist #FBR #FBPE #ABTV #WATON
Made me a placard for tomorrow's #PeoplesMarch. #PeoplesVote #PeoplesVoteMarch #FBPE #Remain #EU #CockAndBalls
Get over it. All killers are killers. That's all they have in common. Rise above the hate, the likes of Katie Hopki… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
...and to all those starting to get on their right-wing bandwagons, here's one that will challenge your "intelligen… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Not every GP is a prolific serial killer; Not every white person is a slave owner; Not every Italian is a moustach… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Not every French person wears onions around their neck; Not every German is a cannibal; Not every American plays ba… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
For all those planning to join the #PeoplesVote march in London tomorrow, beware that there are plans afoot to erec… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
The merchandise has arrived! R.I.P. BREXIT (2016-2019) HERE LIES BREXIT: BIRTHED BY FOOLS KILLED BY INCOMPETENC… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Benedict Francis #Resist #FBR #FBPE #ABTV #WATON
"Thank you for coming in today, Stormy. I know this must be difficult for you, but are you able to identify the def… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
When in-page petition counters drop a tab and put Firestarter on repeat. #RevokeA50Now #RevokeArticle50Nowtwitter.com/i/web/status/1…
When a backward toddler starts headbutting the wall, while blaming her classmates for doing a shit in her pants. N… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
The Will of the People. Old enough to be NOT the will of the current nation. Young enough to be press-ganged int… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Would it be remiss of me to believe whole-heartedly @theresa_may called this press conference just to tell Jacob Re… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Conversely and not-so-strangely, I choose when to expose my children to Andrea Boresome. #UselessTwat m.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/andrea-l…
Another fine example of proving all Trump children need helmets when they walk around. Well done @DonaldJTrumpJr -… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Man who steeps his hair each morning in the fetid putrefaction of the decaying corpse of the democracy that he help… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Then I'm going to celebrate its demise with a beer from every EU state (apart from the UK - because that would be m… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
This Saturday, I'm heading up to London with a million pals to grab Brexit by its corrupt, shriveled bollocks and k… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Dear @GOP While continuing to support the orange cretin, remember: There's only so long you may hold a (well ove… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
I don't think I've ever seen a white supremacist who doesn't look like they've 6 toes on each foot & a condom alrea… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
@ItsAllBollocks <Goes through 1000s of erectile medicine sales and social marketing DMs and flicks...um...back hair>
How many incitements to murder will it take for @realDonaldTrump to move from orange, bumbling idiot to radical cleric? #Twat
Never arm a man with a) a fragile ego b) unfettered access to conservative media c) a holy book c) an extraordinar… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
A little rude of the chap in the background of this story's picture to be so very disparaging about the size of… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Trump and Brexit. History's most successful marketing campaigns for drinking alone.
If only she'd fucked a couple of pornstars, got pissed on by a couple of Russian hookers and grabbed Barnier's puss… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…

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