Articles in Category: Poemeanderings

A collection of generally expletive and euphemism-filled rhymes and utterances.

I Guess That's Why They Call Them The Blues

I'll start this poem with a "cunt";
So as to not surprise.
I'll stop you reading further on,
As swears they will arise. 

Of course I'm talking UKIP Plus,
Or "Tories" as they're known;
Those fucks that dragged the country down 
And tore it to the bone. 

They starve the poor, they feed the rich,
They pillage and they burn; 
They rape the NHS for fun 
And rob you as you earn. 

Theresa May, a Murdoch drone;
A Thatcher wannabe.
“Strong and stable”? Wank-fuelled words; 
Just trite hypocrisy.

Breggzit this and Breggzit that;
So forced she doth pronounce 
The biggest butt-fuck e'er to land
On all our British towns.

She'll hunt the foxes, strip the gays
Of all their dignities; 
And banish those who don't subscribe
To chosen deities.

Her minions pulled from broken times 
When stupid ruled the waves.
Johnson, Davis, Fox & Hunt;
Her loathsome brown-nose slaves.

“Fuck off migrants, go back home,
But stay for use as pawns”
Negotiating human lives
Gives Tories quite the horn.

With hate-fuelled rags, they brainwash folk
To think their lives are hit
By migrants stealing all the jobs.
The rancid, lying shits.

Their lives are hit through policies
Of inept Tory scum;
“So blame the darkies, that’s the plan!”
And so, they turned the dumb.

So please, my friends, as Britain burns
I’ll ask you just this once:
Don’t drown upon this sinking ship
By voting for these cunts!

A Short Prayer to Mr Death

I send this wish to Reaper Grim,
Why the hell won't you take him? 
By "him", I mean that orange twat; 
With hair like some shit roadkill hat. 

I've had enough, I want him gone;
By bullet, spear or randy swan. 
He's dumb, he's coarse, he has no style; 
And some say he's a paedophile. 

So, strike him down, release your curse 
And send that fuck off in a hearse. 
You've had your fun, you let hate thrive; 
Now see that cunt off with your scythe!

Intended as an Opus (But I Got So Annoyed After Five Verses, I Had To Cut It Short), in the key of F minor

To those who think the world is flat,
That science got it wrong;
To those who claim that climate change 
Is such a bloody con;

To those who trust The Daily Mail, 
The Express and the Sun;
To those who drive that safety thrives 
With ownership of guns; 

To all the fools upon this earth
Yes, you so easy led:
Improve your health and hit yourself 
Until you're fucking dead.

All Works Copyright © 2017 Benedict Francis

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