Articles in Category: Poemeanderings

A collection of generally expletive and euphemism-filled rhymes and utterances.

A Swan Song for 2016

In all my years, you’ve been the worst;
You drove through like some fucked-up hearse.
Grabbed our heroes, made us cry
But now we lay YOU down to die.

Bowie, Burns, Aherne and Cohen, 
Wilder, Prince, the list was growin’.
Parfitt, Ali, Wood & Sachs,
Cancer, drugs and heart attacks.

The sadness swelled, your hunger grew;
You bit off more than you could chew!
(Or so we thought, then watched you gorge 
Fisher, Reynolds, Gill and George!)

And humans weren’t your only bent,
You sniped our famous furry friends:
Harambe, Pan Pan, others too
All wild and free (locked in a zoo).

Many more adorned your plate,
Mothers’ pride and fathers late.
As if this feast was not enough,
You thought you’d play with other stuff…

Us Brits you gave a cliff to jump;
America: a cunt called Trump.
Divided nations, left and right
And laundered Klan sheets, oh so white.

With UKIP, Klan and Britain First
You let them grunt their very worst.
A murdered MP for their cause,
The racists knuckled out applause.

Brexit, president-elect;
We tied those nooses round our necks.
With fascist cheers and bigotry;
We turned our backs on rising seas.

Addressing dopes, the dazed, the dumb;
You sent The Mail, you shat The Sun.
You told them lies and instilled fears
Of immigrants with grotesque smears.

You know, my dear, you’ve done your best
But here we stand, we’ll never rest!
We’ll fight, resist and change things round
Until this shit had been unwound.

And so, I’ll lift my bubbling glass 
And promise now, we’ll kick your arse
Straight back to Hell, where you belong
On New Year’s Eve, with drunken song!

Goodbye, you dick, please close the door,
Just slink away to nevermore.
And know we, filled with beer and wine,
Will raise our cups to Auld Lang Syne!


I meant to publish Saturday;
Suspecting you’ll take more away.
But, best I post while I exist;
For fear you’ve got me on your list!


I saw your face, a visage blessed;
Your milky skin, your perfect breast.
You saw me tremble, shy distress.
O’ feelings pained, yet not expressed.

My heart raged thunder in my chest.
Is this love? My soul possessed?
Aching limbs…um, please get dressed!
O’ fuck:

No, I Won't Drop It (In Fuck You Major)

To all my splendid migrant friends,
To all from far and wide,
To all who came to settle
But now swim against the tide

Of narrow-minded racist scum
And ignorance throughout
This once United Kingdom,
Now divided, now sold out.

We’re sorry that our PM fled,
And “Leave” just hid and ran;
While lowlifes all across the land
All hailed the Ku Klux Klan.

Don’t feel alone, don’t feel distressed;
They claim majority,
But with you on our side, you see,
They lose authority.

Forty eight percent of us,
Regrexits and you guys
Amass far greater numbers;
Let’s regroup and harmonise.

In all my years, I’ve never felt
More shameful of this dump.
So, fuck the haters, pack their bags;
Let’s ship them off to Trump!

Get Over It

“Fucking Hell, get over it!”
They said that to my face.
As England fell and Brexiteers
All ran off in disgrace. 

Hate crime rose, the pound collapsed
And prices climbed much higher.
“We won, we’re free, stop whining!”
As their country caught on fire. 

“Sovereignty is back again!
Britannia rules the waves!”
As equal rights and peace on Earth
Settled in their graves.

“We voted out! There’s no EU!”
But why they cannot say.
“To stem the flow of refugees
From lands so far away!”

“They take our jobs, OUR jobs!” they shriek,
Whilst standing in a line
To claim job ‘seeker’ benefits,
“Those benefits are MINE!”

Their rents increase, the NHS
Still waits there looking glum;
“Where’s our millions?” Oopsie daisy…
…Leave? They’ve done a run!

Yet knowing that the Leave campaign
Was total in its lies
Does nothing to dissuade their cause;
Our boat, they did capsize.

“Fucking hell, get over it!”
They said that to my face.
Save my soul, save my kids,
Fuck, save the human race.

All Works Copyright © 2017 Benedict Francis

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